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I’ve had this story nagging my soul for so long and I’ve started writing it so many times only to end up deleting everything because I couldn’t finish it. It’s not like it a novel that would take literally thousands of words. I couldn’t finish because it didn’t feel right to post it on my blog, I didn’t want it to come out as a self-edifying piece because it is exactly the opposite of that.

Then Solace By Rhea reached out through my Instagram, @pinay_inhawaii, for a guest post opportunity, my heart smiled at how fitting the situation is for me to finally write the story of Grace

My Journey

This is the story of my family and though a single post might not be enough to get to details, I sure hope so that it will be enough to capture the heart of this life- GRACE.

My family moved to Cavite mid-80’s, I don’t know the real reason because I was about 6 years old then, but I supposed it was to have a better life. We were poor, really poor and we slept in our relative’s kitchen floor for a while when we moved. Then our first house was a goat shed made out of nipa (coconut leaves) which my parent bought for three hundred pesos. We spent a lot of time scraping the goat poop (it was fun) from the bamboo floor letting it fall through the gaps. It was the place where we spent all our childhood and essentially, most of our lives.

Looking Back

There were parts of that life that still pinch my heart a little but for the most of it, it makes everything in my life today more meaningful and well appreciated. Needless to say, the lack of money was definitely hard and that rippled to a full spectrum of difficulties in our daily life as a family and as individuals. My dad painted cars and did some carpentry work wherever there’s an opportunity and eventually he became a security guard until he retired. Mom became a maid, did laundry for other people, went to Taiwan to be a domestic helper (didn’t work out and she came home after three weeks) and then she found an office job that paid so low but she took it because it was better than nothing.

Even as our resources were scares as a family, my parents opened our home to two boys, our first cousins, who needed real parenting that their own parents couldn’t provide. So, yes, a tiny house with four kids and two parents trying to make it work.

My sister, my brothers and I never had birthday parties, the most we would get was my mom making pancit. We were seldom invited to other children’s party because we didn’t have money to buy birthday gifts. We only had new clothes during Christmas and we weren’t allowed to participate in school activities that had fees or contributions. My parents would fight a lot because there was no money. We never had toys like our cousins and friends but we played a lot. We reveled on hand-me downs and thrift store stuff. We had less than enough.

I went to a private school for high school which our relatives thought was a stupid idea because we couldn’t afford it. I was happy to go a school where there were computer rooms and a gym but it was a tough four years. I took special tests (harder ones) eighty percent of the time because we couldn’t pay tuition on time.  Extra-curricular activities were limited- no field trips or retreats, we kept it to the bare minimum. My sister and brothers were still in elementary in a local public school by then.

My Teens

After graduating high school, I went to college in Manila under a scholarship that paid my tuition for a year until I had to quit because I failed some of my subjects. At that time, we accumulated debt after debt to pay school. There were so many days where I only had a one way fare to school to attend my classes and then borrowed money from friends to eat and get home. College took me six long years to finish. It was a long hard ride that my family and I rode to the end.

Our life is nothing out of the typical poverty story, our situation was everywhere in the Philippines. It was how we were raised that made the difference in our lives. My parents were really good people to start with who love their children more than anything. Our tiny abode was exploding with love and compassion. My parents were and still are ready to defend us and protect us. We were raised with values, discipline and structure in the midst of hardships. Sunday school was important and we were rarely allowed to skip church day and we had to pray every meal and make sure we don’t make a mess when we eat. We were taught how to conduct ourselves in public places and show respect to everyone. Our days are structured that we have time to do our chores, homework and play a lot with friends but we had to be home, clean and bathed before sundown.

My Faith

My parents instilled in us values that I’m so grateful for- not to envy what other people have, to support and never be jealous of our siblings in any way. To help when we can but never allowing anyone to abuse us. To protect and stand up for ourselves when we need to. To pray because prayer works. To live in faith because that works too. Our family isn’t perfect, our parents aren’t, we aren’t perfect, along the way we missed many marks, made wrong calls, but we bounced back to who we are.

Here is something that was very significant in our lives, that even in poverty we kept going. And this is what I want to share with those who will read this.

GRACE, the life of my family is a story of grace after grace after grace. From the small things to huge life decisions, we relied on God’s grace to see us through. It never failed us. Praying unceasingly played a huge part in our lives. We worked hard individually and as a family, but we know that our might wasn’t enough, we need His grace and grace we were bestowed upon day by day.

Dreaming is not exclusive to those who can afford.

My mom wish for us to have a better life than what we were born in and we worked toward that dream so hard. I went to college even when people around us said we were overreaching. We kept moving forward with small step we could muster towards the goal. After college, I worked hard to help provide for my family and help send my siblings to school so they could finish college as well. Again, it was a crazy path we chose to walk on, we shed tears and scraped every hope we could hold on to. When times that we didn’t have food to eat, we held on to our faith knowing that our situation, no matter how long, is temporary but we have to do the work. And the work we did and God did His part in the most amazing way.

Fast Forward Today..

My sister finished school while raising a child, she worked and lived in Singapore and now she’s in Australia, married to wonderful man and has a new daughter. My youngest brother finished college and has his own family as well. My other brother chose another life for himself. My parents are able to travel abroad and see a small part of the world, both retired, provided for and enjoying their life in a nice house and a car, things they didn’t even think about decades ago. As for me, I now live in Hawaii with my amazing husband and my son, Kaleb, living a full life and my story isn’t even done yet. The best is yet to come for us.

There were a hundred things, good and bad, that happened between point A and point B of our lives, as a family and as individuals. A mixture of pain and joy, victories and failures rolled into a beautiful, poignant story. There were so many times that we wanted to give up and felt so beaten up that we had no more will to fight. But we thrived even if it was hard because we had hope and we had faith. My parents knew that we had a chance for a better life even if people around us and even the circumstances of our lives dictated the opposite.

My Reflections

Sure, I still don’t have millions in my bank account, but our life is so far from where we started and it humbles me every day. Everything that we went through in life shaped us to be who we are now, how we appreciate what we have and what values we pass on to our children. My siblings and I, unlike others, we like to look back to when we were kids. We had a happy childhood despite being poor and we laughed at our own story, but most importantly, because of our background we are strong and resilient people but even stronger as a family.

As I end this article, I want to encourage everyone to not let a status in life stop you from becoming the best person you can be and to dream the best life you can ever have. As a parent, I want to emulate my parents for dreaming high for their children and for believing that no matter how rough the path of life is, there is so much hope for those who pray and strive.

I always say this not to praise myself because, really, I don’t have the right to, my life and my family’s life is a testament of God’s love and amazing grace for His children. And the best thing is, the best is still yet to come.

Keep dreaming. Keep striving. Keep praying. Live your life under grace.

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About Post Author

Christine Rivera

Christine was born and raised in the Philippines and lived there for the first 37 years of her life. She moved to Honolulu, Hawaii to be with the love of her life and build a family for their only son, Kaleb. Currently, Christine works full-time and still finds time to write on her blog, upload videos on her YouTube Channel and do all sorts of hobbies.

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